The holidays are my favorite time of year. Thanksgiving in particular has always been a favorite. Like many families, the Bucciero’s have a unique set of traditions during this holiday. Most of these traditions center around being a large, loud, Italian-American family. Every year countless aunts, uncles, parents, family-friends, godparents, and cousins make the 5 hour drive from various parts of New England back to my Father’s childhood home in Utica, New York to stay with my Papa; the patriarch of the Bucciero family. It’s generally a three day feast with enough food to feed a small nation, and definitely enough to feed the family for a month.
A typical Bucciero Thanksgiving starts with a small road trip. Most of us arrive on Wednesday, but some arrive a day early or a day later depending on everyone’s schedules with work and whatnot. We cook for at least two days prior and many bring a variety of meals and dishes that they had prepared back home, as well as cook much more once we all arrive. On the morning of thanksgiving, we all head to Paul’s Pub for an even bigger reunion. My Papa was the 10th out of 12 children so my Father has about 60 plus first cousins. They all have kids now, and some of them have kids as well, so hundreds of extended Bucciero’s pack into the tiny pub down the street from Papa’s house. Even though I see most of these people every year for Thanksgiving, many of them are still strangers to me. However, we all make sure to squeeze into a family photo by the pool tables every year for as far back as I can remember. After a couple hours of drinking lots of wine by only 11 in the morning, we head back to the house. We then continue to cook for another three hours before finally eating around two. We gather around a small dining room table, where we have to pull out chairs from the kitchen, and even a couple lawn chairs to fit everyone. We first say grace and then all raise our wine glasses and cheers in a uniform “Salute!” We then stuff our faces with turkey, potatoes, sweet potatoes, squash, stuffing, and some foods not as common at a non-Italian thanksgiving like, baked ziti, lasagna, chicken parm, and Italian wedding soup. Then we usually tell stories from our childhoods and have a big, howling laugh together. After it’s over, we all pitch in and pick up our plates, put the food away, wash the dishes, and then precede to pass out in a food coma. We can’t hang around for too long though, because within an hour, the dessert comes out. Every year we have about 10 pies that take up the whole dining room table. Finally, after dessert we all hang around and usually watch a movie together. Then when it’s time for bed, we all crawl into the various bedrooms, onto air mattresses, pull out sofas, and couches where we eventually end the night. Most of us participate in some black Friday madness the next day, and then we all go our separate ways (with piles of leftovers) after church on Sunday. Then, we get together and do it all again at Christmas!
To me, this is what it means to be Italian. Family is everything to us, and our traditions are just as important. I grew up in an extremely close family, my cousins are like siblings and are some of my best friends to this day. I love feeling claustrophobic in my Papa’s small house, I love having to yell in order to be heard, I love seeing 40 years of my family’s heights listed in faded marker on the bathroom door, I love eating homemade Italian food, and I love sharing memories together. It’s been hard as time has gone on to get every single person back home for Thanksgiving. Some people have to work and some are married and have to split their time between two families now. Last Christmas was the first time in years every single person was together, it was very special as that doesn’t happen anymore. I will always be a proud, strong, Italian woman who values her family more than anything. I hope to someday I’ll get married and my children will get to experience the same kind of family traditions and values that I had growing up. Being a family-oriented Italian woman is part of who I am, and I am proud of that!
